


SPN Coda - Cas's Deal

by heylittleangel



Series: Supernatural Codas - Season 14 [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-12-25 09:48:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18258833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heylittleangel/pseuds/heylittleangel





	SPN Coda - Cas's Deal

Dean is in the war room of the bunker, waiting for Cas to get home. He’s pissed, because, again, they have another deal to handle and Cas and Jack didn’t even bother to tell him or Sam. Okay, maybe the kid isn’t guilty, since Cas asked him not to tell them anything, but still. Dean keeps pacing from one end of the room to the other, getting more and more impatient. At least he’s alone in the bunker, so there’s no one to judge him for pacing.

He hears the door open and looks up to see Cas entering. Stopping at the end of the stairs, he crosses his arms over his chest and taps his foot on the floor. 

“Hey Dean, I thought you went hunting with Sam and Jack.” Cas stops in the middle of the stairs.

“Yeah, I was going to, but we gotta talk.” He looks at Cas, and knows that he must looks pissed, but doesn’t care. He has the right to.

“What happened?” Cas looks concerned and keeps going down the stairs, until he stops in front of Dean.

“You don’t have anything to tell me? Maybe about Jack’s return?” He raises an eyebrow. Cas’s eyes widen.

“Uhm… no?” He tries to get past, but Dean grabs his arm.

“Really? Because Jack had something to say to me about that day and it ain’t good”.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He pulls his arm free of Dean’s hold and heads for his room.

“Oh, I think you do.” Dean starts following Cas. “About the deal you made with the Empty. You know, so he would let Jack’s soul go with you.” Cas stops suddenly and Dean almost hits him.

“I asked Jack not to tell you. Or Sam.” He doesn’t turn but he doesn’t keep walking either.

“Oh, he didn’t want to. But he started saying something about it and I couldn’t let go, so I made him tell me.” Dean walks until he’s in front of Castiel, who keeps his head down, avoiding Dean’s eyes. “So, how much time do you got? Do you have to do something for it? What did the Empty ask in return, huh?” Cas sighs and raises his head.

“It… it just said that it’ll come for when I let myself be happy.” 

“What? Why would it do that? What’s the point?”

“Well, it said it wants me to suffer, probably because I woke it when I was there, but I don’t know the exact reason. It wasn’t like we were having a good chat.” 

“Why would you do that Cas? Why sacrifice yourself again?” 

“Really, Dean? You’re really asking me why?” Dean opens his mouth to answer but Cas doesn’t let him. “I couldn’t just leave Jack there or let him go with the Empty,” he scoffs.  
“And it’s not like happiness is knocking on my door, is it? So I don’t really see the problem here.” He starts walking again, getting away from Dean.

“Don’t see the… WHAT? Are you insane?” Dean turns and goes after Castiel. “How can you not see the problem here? Besides lying to me and Sam, of course.” Cas laughs, actually laughs, though without humour.

“Really, Dean? YOU, of all people, are saying that to me?” he turns and stares into Dean’s eyes “You’re a fucking hypocrite, do you know that?” Dean’s caught of guard with the swear, but Cas doesn’t seem to notice. “You have no right to say that to me. You were running off to throw yourself in the ocean without telling anyone about it. So don’t look me in the eyes and say that I was wrong for not telling you guys about it. You didn’t need that burden with everything that was happening. And like I said, it’s not like happiness is something that we’ll get right now, don’t you think?” he abruptly turns and enters his room.

Dean stays frozen for a few seconds, not knowing what to think, then walks into Cas’s room. “Cas, you would never be a burden to us, you know that. You can always tells us, because we’re family. We may be pissed, but we’ll always do what we can to help each other.” Cas sits on the edge of his bed.

“Really? Then why didn’t you tell us about the Ma’lak box?” Cas raises his eyes and the stare he gives Dean looks like it goes right into his soul. Dean shivers and looks down, not being able to look into Cas’ eyes. “No, seriously Dean, why? We were doing everything we could to find a way out for you, something that would help, and you practically ignored that. Ignored all of our efforts. You were going to kill yourself without even saying goodbye. We would never have known what happened to you. Can you even start to think how that would make any of us feel? Your mother, Sam, Jack… me?” Dean raises his head and the lost look on Cas’s face melts his anger.

“It’s different. We could actually have a shot at getting you out of the deal. But there’s nothing we can to do about Michael.”

“And why is that? Because Billie said so?”

“Yeah, because she said, and I think that when Death tells you something, you should believe it.” Dean rubs his eyes, annoyed at the tears there.

“So why you didn’t you tell us about the book? We could have helped. We could have used to change our actions.”

“No, Cas, you couldn’t. There’s no changing fate.” Cas snorts.

“‘There’s no changing fate? You should believe in what Death says?’ Really Dean? I can’t believe you’re actually saying that. If I remember correctly, I rebelled and fell because of you. Because you were changing fate by not accepting being Michael’s vessel. And when Sam was soulless, you ignored everyone, even Death, saying it was a bad idea to put his soul back and yet you did it. I can’t believe that you actually believe it. Ever thought that maybe Billie gave you the book so you could change it, since you’re pretty good at it?” Dean sighs.

“This is different, Cas. I… I can’t just put my life ahead of the billions that’ll die if Michael gets out. And he will. I can feel the door getting weaker every day.”

“Why is it that you are always eager to die, but when it’s me or Sam and now Jack you’re willing to risk everything, no matter the consequences?”

“Because I don’t deserve it! You guys are so much better than me; Me being alive or dead wouldn’t even make a difference!” Dean sobs and falls to his knees. Cas gets up and kneels besides him, embracing him, like he could protect Dean from everything if he just holds him hard enough.

“Of course it would make a difference. All the people that you saved wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. And about Sam, Jack, Mary? Or me? What do you think I would be if it wasn’t for you?” Dean buries his face in Cas’s chest and tightens his grip on him.

“You’d probably still have your wings and be in Heaven.”

“Yeah, and at what cost? I told you once and I’ll tell you again: knowing you has been the best part of my life. From what you told me about how I could have been, the version of me that never knew you, I much prefer myself now than how I was before pulling you out of hell, because you showed me what was worth fighting for and it wasn’t what Heaven wanted.” Cas puts his hands on Dean’s face and makes him look into his eyes. “Dean, you’re worth more than a lot of humans I’ve met, believe me. We’ll find a way to get Michael out of you and we’ll find a way to get me out of the deal. But we have to work together and stop hiding things from each other, okay? We have ten years of experience to know that the secrets never help.” Dean nods.

“Okay, I’ll try not to hide anything anymore, I promise.” Dean buries his face on Cas’s chest again and knows that he would everything not to lose this. He will fight against Michael and the Empty and anyone or anything that tries to take his family away.


End file.
